Dear Ian David Baker,
You’re here! You came sooner than predicted by the doctors but only 2 days sooner than I thought you would get here. I thought my due date might be the 15th instead of the 22nd of November. Either way you are here with us and we are in complete wonder of you. We have spent the past week terrified yet mesmerized by your cry, your dependence upon us, your expressions, your movements…
Everything about you is truly fearfully and wonderfully made!
Your general mood seems to be sweet and loving but quick to upset when you are stressed. Initially you liked to lay against me when you were sleepy but I was baffled about how to calm you down when you would get upset. Even if we fixed the problem it seemed that the flood gates were already open and there was no way to turn down the emotion. I’m not sure if we are starting to speak the same language or if you are finally starting to get to know us outside of my tummy. At first when you would cry you would push our hands away. Now it seems like you are starting to enjoy kisses and hugs and we can calm you down much more quickly. Every day brings something new!
It’s a tough world out here. I never realized how traumatic it could be for you. In the first 24 hours you had shots, circumcision, bright lights, cold air, loud noises, strangers, broken sleep patterns and a completely different way of nourishing yourself. I would have a meltdown from that kind of stress. Life is funny. During the past 9 months I felt so protective of you and within the first 24 hours of you being here I could do nothing but watch as people poked and prodded you. It was more exhausting for me than giving birth because I felt so helpless. You’re home now and all I can say is it might get pretty ugly for the next person who messes with you.
Now that we are safe and sound in our little home we are forming our own rhythm and slowly but surely life is starting to calm down. Every day feels a little more normal and I breath a deep sigh every time I see you look up at me or your daddy. I can’t believe you are all ours!
1. You were born at 4:25 pm on November 13th 2013 after mama’s water broke and she began labor at 1:45 am. Your daddy never left our side through it all and he coached me through 14 hours of some pretty intense waves of pain.
Note: I hadn’t really had any contractions prior to that so I thought it was false labor and didn’t wake daddy until about 3:00am. Daddy timed out the contractions on a phone app until about 5:00 am at which point we called the doctor because they were about 5 minutes apart. You fought coming at all but eventually you got here!
2. You weighed 7 pounds and 3 ounces and were 20.5 inches long when you arrived and you cried and cried initially. You had little bags under your eyes and really puffy lips when you were first laid on my chest. I thought you looked so tired.
3. Your hair was not thick but it was brown and curled into little tight rings on your head when you got here. It’s a little softer and straighter now.
4. I was one proud mama because you started breastfeeding perfectly within an hour! So smart and you have a very good appetite!
5. Your favorite clothing option right now is a gown with a stretchy bottom and built in baby gloves that flip over your hands and keep them warm.
6. You don’t like to be swaddled tight. You prefer to be wrapped loosely so you can spread out your arms and legs. However, you cry if your feet wiggle out and get cold.
7. You have a pout I keep trying to capture in a photograph. When you are sleeping sometimes you make all kinds of faces and one is a pout face in which you stick your lower lip out and bring your non-existant eyebrows together. Words just don’t do it justice!
8. So far we think you have daddy’s eyes and mama’s nose and chin. The jury is still out on your mouth. God did not see fit to provide you with eyebrows just yet but I’m sure He’ll get around to it!
9. When you get really upset you make a sound that sounds like an angry cat spitting ( anyone who has ever cornered and angry cat knows what I mean!). When you’re happy you make soft little sounds and smile and stick your tongue out.
10. Oh this is probably something to remember. Your daddy and I didn’t agree on your full name until about 30 minutes before you were born. Ian is a Scottish/Gaelic version of the name John. It means God is Gracious. In Hebrew it means Gift from God. Of course we got your middle name from daddy.
I’ll have plenty more to tell you I’m sure, but I just want you to know how much I love you and your dad. You two are my silver lining in this life. You’re my joy and I couldn’t be prouder of my two men.
We love you!
Mama and Daddy